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2023

| Playlists |

Q4 – 2023 Playlist

by Robert Hyma January 4, 2024
written by Robert Hyma

The finale playlist of 2023 let the dam loose in terms of new and vibrant music. Maybe there was a sudden influx of new releases, or that Spotify’s Discover Weekly playlist was sandbagging most of the year, but through the floodgates surged new artists and hit songs that kept coming in strong. Quarter Four 2023 is an eclectic collective of moody and transient tunes best played in the background of every facet of life.

Let’s start with “BURY YOU” by Ari Abdul, a go-to track to just feel damned cool about a possessive relationship (and how about that album art? It’s like a GQ featuring a glam-up of the dead girl from “The Ring” and totally awesome). “Winona” by Miloe, Jamila Woods, & Vagabon is surprisingly layered and reflective piece infused with a catchy trio of voices that sets this song afloat to another plane. “buzz cut” by lovelytheband and MisterWives is a collab that comes with the guitar rhythm of a hit Pheonix track, and who doesn’t love that?

Rounding out the playlist are some emotionally apropos tracks like “Worrying” by Clean Cut Kid, a sobering and campfire sing-song track about the waste of worry and anxiety. Chappell Roan sings another sex anthem in “Red Wine Supernova”, followed by another anthemic declaration of human nature “Human Being” by Arkells & Lights.

This has been my most played playlist for just about any endeavor. So click the Spotify banner below, skip through the tracks that resonate, try the others, and see if there’s something that winds up on a playlist of your making. As always, comment below to mention new faves, suggestions of your own, and anything else you felt while browsing the tracks below.

2023 music over and out!

  1. “Sylvania (Nanana)” by Bay Ledges
  2. “Close to Me” by Hembree
  3. “Slide Tackle” by Japanese Breakfast
  4. “BURY YOU” by Ari Abdul
  5. “Winona” by Miloe, Jamila Woods, Vagabon
  6. “Coming Attractions” by Nodaway
  7. “buzz cut” by lovelytheband, MisterWives
  8. “Out of Vogue” by Fever Dolls
  9. “MANGO” by Grace Mitchell
  10. “Yellow Brick Road” by Dylan Cartlidge
  11. “Moonshine” by Hippo Campus
  12. “Siddhartha” by Dead Emerson
  13. “Worrying” by Clean Cut Kid
  14. “Red Wine Supernova” by Chappell Roan
  15. “Human Being” by Arkells, Light
  16. “Patio” by George Moir
  17. “Sunday” by Sea Lemon
  18. “Technicolor” by Teddi Gold
Robert Hyma’s Q4 2023 Playlist

January 4, 2024 0 comments
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| Playlists |

Q3 – 2023 Playlist

by Robert Hyma January 4, 2024
written by Robert Hyma

Then, there was Quarter Three of 2023. You’ll notice that there isn’t the usual number of tracks in this playlist. That’s largely because it was a time of summer fun and, honestly, not finding much that piqued my musical interests. Often, finding new music is a lottery draw and either music hits or doesn’t. I went back to HONEYMOAN as filler since I was in love with this band for most of 2023 (still am, but shhh…). The New Pornographers released a new album and I found it difficult to keep on repeat other than a few selections. “Continue as a Guest” has a faraway view of existential crisis, reverberating like a metronome with its melodic electric guitar rhythm. It was the epitome of this playlist, I have found.

Some surprises wandered onto my repeat list, including Lizzy Farrall’s “Barbados”, a surprising bop that sounds like something out of the early 2010s. A country song recommendation by Ethan Tasch made its way into the mix, which sounded anything but the genre tagged, and became a great city-drive background track. “Grade A” by spill tab & JAWNY is an absolute jam and worthy of any pick-me-up playlist out there, while “Bloom” by Matilda Mann is an acoustic-guitar ambient song that’s both contemplative and contemporary in an addictive way.

It’s a shortened offering this time around, but no less enticing. Click on the Spotify logo below for a listen!

  1. “Continue as a Guest” by The New Pornographers
  2. “Barbados” by Lizzy Farrall
  3. “Gym Song” by HONEYMOAN
  4. “Grade A” by spill tab, JAWNY
  5. “Bloom” by Matilda Mann
  6. Lie Like You Want Me Back” by Yumi Zouma
  7. “Lavender” by Ashleigh Ball
  8. “Holdup” by Ethan Tasch
  9. “We’re All Gonna Die” by Joy Oladokun, Noah Kahan
  10. “Show You Off” by HONEYMOAN
Robert Hyma’s Q3 – 2023 Playlist
January 4, 2024 0 comments
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| Playlists |

Q2 – 2023 Playlist

by Robert Hyma January 2, 2024
written by Robert Hyma

Quarter Two 2023 was lighter, fuller, and just better overall. I had found a serious girlfriend, my first year back in college was coming to a close and I was deeply enjoying my classes. The music was hitting, too. Eight months later, things have changed drastically (the girlfriend isn’t a thing any longer; the classes are still enjoyable), but the music from this particular Playlist I come to more often than all the others.

“Dirt Boy” by Peach Face & Not Charles is the perfect thumping start. Hidden gems like “Little Boxes” by Walk off the Earth and “Thunder in the City” by Future Generations became songs to stop upon when skipping through the sludge of older, macabre playlists. Add to the ear-pleasures the likes of IAMDYNAMITE and Mikaela Davis‘s harp ballad “Other Lover” and the balance of this Q2 playlist hits the highs and lows of a varied 2023.

Not to mention that HONEYMOAN became a playlist all its own in my personal collection; that band is a cacophony of sound and emotionality that strikes to the core of my musical longings. Be sure to check out “Sorry Like You Mean It” from their new album of the same name.

Like much of 2023, Q2 was a huge hill to climb. The results were a much more mundane trickle into Q3, which you can sample here. Funny how a playlist tells so much about the time it was created in our lives, you know?

Click on the big SPOTIFY logo below for the Q2 -2023 Playlist!

  1. “Dirty Boy” by Peach Face, Not Charles
  2. “Everything Goes (Wow)” by BROODS
  3. “Orpheus” by The Beaches
  4. “Still Here” by HONEYMOAN
  5. “Little Boxes” by Walk off the Earth
  6. “Pink Chateau” by In The Valley Below
  7. “Solar Power – Spotify Singles” by Glass Animals
  8. Tell Me What You Want” by Caroline Rose
  9. “Sorry Like You Mean It” by HONEYMOAN
  10. “DAYLIGHT DOOM” by MOTO BANDIT
  11. “Paresthesia” by Wild Ones
  12. “Losing My Mind” by Montaigne
  13. “Thunder In The City” by Future Generations
  14. “Colors” by Anaïs Cardot
  15. “Bloom” by IAMDYNAMITE
  16. “Other Lover” by Mikaela Davis
  17. Sleepwalkin’ – Daydreamin’ Version” by Better Oblivion Community Center, Phoebe Bridgers, Conor Oberst
  18. “Sit Right” by HONEYMOAN
  19. “Not A Go” by foamboy
Robert Hyma’s Q2 – 2023 Playlist
January 2, 2024 0 comments
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| Playlists |

Q1 – 2023 Playlist

by Robert Hyma January 1, 2024
written by Robert Hyma

My, my it’s the start of 2024 and this playlist is finally available for public viewing. I say that as though there was a smattering of requests to make them available, which is the fanfare that I imagine my playlists will one day come to be revered for.

My playlists are a bit like the past few SNL Seasons: you didn’t feel like watching at the time, but after catching a few sketches on YouTube, they are worth catching up on.

But beyond the hype, beyond the internet masses demanding to finally have access to last year’s playlists, here’s a roundup of Quarter One of 2023:

The Collection has slowly become one of those atmospheric bands that captures complex ideas in memorable tubes, which made sense to have them open the playlist and close it with songs that remember the good times in “Rose Colored Glasses” and “Love at the End of the World”. New releases from old favorites came out in droves over the first three months of the year (thanks in large part to Spotify acting as a dental office of sorts, sending out constant reminders of when a cleaning new EP is coming up). Filling out the playlist were thumpers like Half-Alive’s “Never Been Better” and “What’s Wrong”. Vulfpeck and Fitz and The Tantrums delivered must-have tracks, and Chappell Roan is becoming one of those starlit singer/songwriters that you cram into conversation for them to check out next.

Some new ear-ticklers rounded out the first quarter selection in Tove Styrke’s “Say My Name” and Amor Amor’s “Can I Go Away”. Add to the productivity playlist the reminiscing lyrics of Laura Jean’s “Too Much To Do” and the beginning of 2023 encapsulated feelings of get-up-and-get-going as well as we’ve-done-the-best-we-could

It’s a playlist of jams and good times to start the new year and is sure to have something for everyone. Give it a listen and leave a comment with what tracks you added to your mixes!

  1. “Rose Colored Glasses” by The Collection
  2. “Never Been Better” by Half-Alive, Orla Gartland
  3. “Dressed to Kill” by The Wombats
  4. “Too Much To Do” by Laura Jean
  5. “Them Jeans” by Joe Hertler & the Rainbow Seekers
  6. “New Guru” by Vulfpeck, Antwaun Stanley
  7. “crashing down – acoustic” by Arlie
  8. “Carry You Home” by Circa Waves
  9. “I Wanna Dance With You” by Royel Otis
  10. “What’s Wrong” by Half-Alive
  11. “Can I Go Away” by Amor Amor
  12. “Good Nights” by Fitz and The Tantrums
  13. “19 in a Week” by Nieve Ella
  14. “Two Tens” by Cordae, Anderson .Paak
  15. “Honey” by Samia
  16. “better” by dee holt
  17. “Gordan Ramsey” by Abhi the Nomad, Kato On The Track
  18. “Say My Name” by Tove Styrke
  19. “Vines to Make It All Worth It” by Runner
  20. “Love at the End of the World” by The Collection
Robert Hyma’s Quarter One 2023 Playlist
January 1, 2024 0 comments
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| Weekly Post-Eds |

Weekly Post-Ed #56

by Robert Hyma May 31, 2023
written by Robert Hyma

HAIR ENTANGLEMENT THEORY

A little side observation before getting to the guts of this Weekly Post-Ed: There are a lot of English idioms having to do with HAIR. Here are a few:

  • A bad HAIR day
  • By a HAIR’s length
  • Getting in someone’s HAIR
  • Having your HAIR stand on end (turns out it was always END instead of IN, which makes much more sense visually after having looked up these expressions—the more you know)
  • Tearing one’s HAIR out

And on and on and on.

HAIR is a fascinating characteristic of human beings. And clearly, HAIR is so important that it expresses sentiment like no other body part could. 

  • A bad MOUTH day? | Nah.
  • Tearing one’s FINGERNAILS out? | Ouch, no thanks.
  • Crawling into one’s…

Well, you get the point.

Lately, I’ve come to appreciate HAIR in a different way. To one-two-skip-a-few my way past some central details, I’m currently in a romantic relationship (or, maybe I mean a romantic entanglement? You know, because HAIR gets tangled and so do our romantic lives…they en-tangle? Get it? Fine, I’ll drop it…). And in those early stages of dating, we start to wonder when things are official. How does anyone know they’ve been dating long enough to be in a relationship?

It’s an awkward classification. No one wants to come out and ask, “Hey, would you like to be my girlfriend now?” Not cool. In fact, there’s such a debate about how the current dating scene enters into relationships that the topic is avoided altogether. Dates with the same partner can go on and on, stretching past half a year without any signifier in place. Sure, your date comes to family events at this point, hangs out with your friends, and all the steps of “getting serious” have been checked off…but when a friend asks, “Is that your girlfriend?”

You reply, “I don’t know.”

This is called a situationship—a purposely undefined relationship that has all the fixings of normal couplehood…but without the finicky mess when two people break up and it doesn’t hurt as much?

I’m not really sure what the point of the situationship is. To me, they don’t really exist—it’s just a crudely veiled couple doing couple-things and we all know what’s going on (much like a five-year-old when asked what just broke in other room where they were playing says, “I don’t know.”)

Right—we all know.

“It’s 2023,” you say (yes, YOU—thanks for interrupting, jeez). “Why do we even need labels?”

We don’t. Good point. But I just wanna know if people are together, don’t you? 

Dating today is like binge watching a new show that has you hooked—at a certain point, you just want the love interest to get together because you can’t take the suspense any longer.

“Just kiss already!” you scream at the romantic comedy playing out before your eyes. “I get that I’m watching four episodes at a time for a show that was meant to be consumed weekly, but it’s killing me! Just kiss! Come on!”

Yeah, that’s how it feels when it appears obvious things are progressing well with a new romantic partner.

Luckily, there is another way of knowing a relationship is on the right track, and it has to do with HAIR.

I would wager that most of us have experienced this very thing: When a relationship is getting serious, there is suddenly a significant amount of HAIR from your significant other all over the place. It starts sticking to clothes after a date, which is cute, but then the entire thing turns into a full-blown springtime HAIR pollination. Soon, HAIR finds its way under your clothes, in wallets and purses, in the bathroom sink, or tangled (en-tangled? Right, right) in jewelry/watches/earrings. It sticks to car seats, ends up in leftovers from the night before, and is found in crevices and corners of the house where this person has yet to tread!

Soon, there’s no escaping it—this person’s HAIR clings to you, like some cosmically connected puppet strings.

That’s because, my friend, this is the Universe’s way of informing that you two are, officially, together.

Ever hear of string theory? Right, well this is basically the same thing—but with HAIR and romantic couples. It’s called Hair Entanglement Theory. It’s very scientific.

Yup.

So, the next time HAIR starts appearing in all the randomest places (including the inside of the coffee filter or spontaneously caught in your mouth), you will know why. Nature is quite literally entangling (I know, enough with the puns, but this one feels passable) you with this other person.

It’s like an unconscious marking-of-territory…but with HAIR.

And I love it. It’s endearing. For now. I assume it stays that way. Always? Yes…I think…maybe.

But in the meantime, feel free to sound off in the comments about the most bitchin’ of lint rollers!

***

AND NOW THE TEARS COME…

About this new website look: Perhaps you’ve noticed a slight aesthetic change while scrolling through this Weekly Post-Ed. If it looks familiar, you may have heard of this little game that came out recently, The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom. If you haven’t heard of it, it’s fine. It’s just this little arthouse game developed by a little-known publisher from a little known country for little-to-no fanfare and—

Oh forget it: IF YOU HAVEN’T HEARD ABOUT THIS GAME, YOU’VE BEEN UNDER A ROCK—ONE WITHOUT A HIDDEN KOROK!

“Ya hah ha! You found me!”
Courtesy of The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild

The latest iteration of The Legend of Zelda is the most surprising sequel in that it exceeds the puzzle-solving, creative mechanics of the previous game, The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild, in almost every way. The game takes every element of world exploration and ratches it up to new heights (both in the sky and below ground). Never has a sequel been so anticipated to be lackluster before launch and has completely knocked the socks off of anyone who has played it.

Yeah, it’s a big friggin’ deal, this game.

So, in celebration of the new Zelda title, I hope you all enjoy The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom website makeover, complete with new logo and original artwork. It was time to freshen up the website, something blossoming with the life of spring and summer (which, if you live in Michigan, has been tragically absent the past two months—until this past week, coincidentally). There’s no better video game homage to nature and how integrated the inhabitants of this world are connected through its influence than The Legend of Zelda series.

Take a moment to browse the new logo and accompanying artwork below!

***

SUMMER REUNION DONE QUICK 2023

Courtesy of TheYetee.com

It’s that special time of summer: Summer Games Done Quick 2023. For those in the know, SGDQ is a 7-day charity event streaming on Twitch.tv showcasing speedruns of games new and old. The event raises money for MSF (Doctors Without Borders) and has since raised nearly 40-million dollars throughout the event’s history for charities around the world. Not only that, it’s an event that brings together the gaming community for a great cause while celebrating tentpole gaming series such as: Super Mario Bros, Sonic the Hedghog, Super Metroid, Mega Man, The Legend of Zelda, Dark Souls, and so much more.

TL;DR: SGDQ 2023 is simply a very entertaining way to spend an hour or two watching the best Speedrunners in the world showcase some old favorites and newly released games receiving the speedrun treatment.

Since I don’t have exact numbers, I’m going to say this is my tenth year tuning into Games Done Quick events (although, I could look through my collection of event T-shirts bought from by TheYetee.com—please check out their designs for SGDQ 2023; they make the best shirts *smiles*). While I’m always excited for the marathon to begin, I find that I tune in less and less throughout the seven-day event each year. This isn’t a knock on event organizers or the games on offer—instead, I think my sensibilities have changed. When I first stumbled across this event, the shock of seeing the original Super Mario Bros. beaten in 30-minutes was unthinkably fast—just some guy holding down the run button and evading every lava pit and koopa-troopa on screen en route to beating a game in under a half hour, something that I never could do during my entire childhood.

And after ten years of watching, I’ve seen my favorite games speedrun(ran?) multiple times. While I’m still hankering to donate, grab the event T-shirt, and support a great cause with a fantastic gaming community, I find I am not willing to visit as often as before.

At this juncture, GDQ Events feel like a family reunion that you’ve attended every year and are considering skipping for this next time.

Then again, this is FAMILY we’re talking about, so maybe buck it up and pay a little visit just to show everyone that, yes, you still love them.

(This became SLIGHTLY autobiographical, but I think the same theme rings true for both.)

What I’m most excited for, now, is watching the latest batch of time-saves and shaved minutes off of previous my favorite games that haven’t appeared in the marathon for a few years. For example, when I first watched the Luigi’s Mansion 100% speedrun from six years ago, the estimated time was around 1 hour 34 minutes. As of Sunday evening, the time it took to complete the game was down to 1 hour 9 minutes. It’s inspiring to see communities of players discover new tricks and tactics to games that were released 20+ years ago. And the quest to find even more is still going on.

Whatever way you slice SGDQ 2023 – if tuning in for the first time or are a veteran viewer of the marathon – it’s an event that always gives. Whether this means viewers contributing donations for the first time, testimonials about how much finding a community of friends meant from attending, or tickling that nostalgia fancy with all those games from growing up, SGDQ 2023 offers something for everyone.

Plus, like family, you’re always welcome back for the yearly get-together. No strings attached.

Here are the runs that I’m looking forward to for the remainder of the week (NOTE: These are the times as of this writing–they are bound to fluctuate throughout the event, so keep an eye on the up-to-date schedule here)

***

  1. “Little Boxes” by Walk Off the Earth
  2. “Pink Chateau” by In The Valley Below
  3. “Solar Power – Spotify Singles” by Glass Animals

***

Wishing everyone as well as you can be. You’re not alone out there,

May 31, 2023 0 comments
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| Weekly Post-Eds |

Weekly Post-Ed #51

by Robert Hyma January 12, 2023
written by Robert Hyma

KUDOS DONE QUICK

Image via gamesdonequick.com

By the time you read this, Awesome Games Done Quick 2023 will be halfway over. If you don’t know about Awesome Games Done Quick, here’s the TL;DR: it’s a 7-day video gaming marathon packed full of speedruns raising money for charity (for this event: The Prevent Cancer Foundation). Old favorites ranging from Super Mario Bros. 3 to Crash Bandicoot 3: Warped, as well as newer games such as Stray and Pokémon Legends: Arceus, are beaten in record time to the delight of tens of thousands watching online, and all for a great cause.

For me, the joy of watching AGDQ isn’t so much about basking in the nostalgia of games from childhood, but of watching something completely new. There’s bound to be something you’ve never seen before at AGDQ. So far in the marathon, the biggest surprise was a game called Fashion Police Squad, a DOOM-esque shooter where a police officer fires a fashion gun and warrants justice to all the “fashion crimes” done in his city: Men wearing baggy suits and tourist dads with socks with sandals around the city, and so much more. The lighthearted and humorous gameplay made it an instant favorite of the event.

Of course, the most notable aspect about AGDQ 2023 was the brave and necessary stance of event organizers in response of two measures recently passed in the state of Florida, the seminal location of AGDQ for over a decade.

In a statement on the GDQ website, the reasons for canceling the live event in favor of an online-only format shortly before this year’s event were thus:

“While we would love to return in-person, we’ve determined that to provide a safe and welcoming event to all, it was best that we move away from our originally planned location in Florida.

Given the state’s continued disregard for COVID-19’s dangers (including anti-mandate vaccination policies) and an increased aggression towards LGBTQ+ individuals, including the law colloquially known as “Don’t Say Gay,” we do not believe it is a safe place for our community at this time…”

The full statement has since been removed from the official GDQ website due to the site’s overhaul while covering the event, but the full statement can be found on Kotaku’s website here.

It’s the kind of decision that makes me proud to tune into this event year after year. GDQ has always been a beacon for the gaming community and has since shown support through action that community matters more than politics and taking a financial loss. This year in particular, I’m proud to donate.

There are three days left to check out the marathon (outside of the quick uploads from the GDQ YouTube Channel in case there’s something you missed!), but here is a short list of runs I’m still looking forward to:

***

CONSPIRACY THEORIES LITE

The more I continue this reentry into college, the more I dislike the idea of the English Major. I’m nearly through with this first week of classes of the semester and am reading from three different sources: A Norton Anthology, The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain, and a novella called Faces in the Crowd by Valeria Luiselli. 

If that sounds like a lot, it is.

Not because of the reading (which, if you’re an English Major like I am, you better like it) but because I’m tired of this rapid-fire “Hey, diagnose this thing you just read! Immediately!”

After every thirty pages of a novella I haven’t read before, I’m asked to scour pages, looking for themes and symbols as though I’m Robert Langdon from The Da Vinci Code. Never mind the rest of the novel; we can’t be bothered to finish it before finding MEANING. And once we find MEANING, all will be right with the world.

Not really, but maybe the stakes in an undergrad course feels reminiscent to that. Personally, I’d rather finish a new novella and digest it for a second. This process of diagnosing a longform piece of writing every 30-pages feels like stopping a movie every twenty minutes, turning to the person next to you, and asking “What do you think the movie is about?”

How about we just finish the goddam movie first?

The art of literary criticism is very boring, and more than I’d like to comment on with this Weekly Post-Ed. And if you’re asking, “Then, why be an English Major?” Well, seeking a degree to read more stories has its downsides. It’s a bit like having children—you love them more than you can express…but dealing with shit is just part of the job. Literary criticism can be a way of better engaging with stories, but most often criticism is show-and-tell for academic types. Where else can a critic say without inducing comas in a public place, “Hey, I know the REAL reason the author wrote this book!”

Literary criticism, really, is just Conspiracy Theory Lite—less sugar and calories than the real thing.

Of course, if you informed the author or writer of your genius piece of criticism, they would probably shrug, smile kindly, and say, “That’s fun. Now, please go away. I have a life to live.”

I assume I’m one of those “real” writers when I leave class each day. I shake off the literary critic I pretend to be, put away the ceaseless conspiracy theories that are somehow college credited, and I go home to write something.

Hopefully it’s something good. Most of the time it’s not.

You just hope that, eventually, something decent gets on the page.

That’s my own working conspiracy theory, anyways.

***

  1. “This City Reminds Me of You” by APRE

***

Wishing everyone as well as you can be. You’re not alone out there,

January 12, 2023 0 comments
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| Weekly Post-Eds |

Weekly Post-Ed #50

by Robert Hyma January 5, 2023
written by Robert Hyma

ABOUT THAT POKÉMON ARTWORK…

Let’s get it out of the way quickly: I’ve been away for a while. The reason? I could name about a dozen – petty and not so petty – but the important thing is getting back into it.

One thing I will make clear is that this Weekly Post-Ed is going to be rusty.

I mean it. I haven’t written one in over a month. It’s like a guitarist that hasn’t plucked the strings in a while—those first few notes are going to be all over the place. The F-sharps, and D-flats are likely to tinge the ears something awful–ouch.

Case in point: The Pokemon-inspired artwork above. It’s the logo of Pokémon Scarlet, which isn’t only old news, it’s not even what this Weekly Post-Ed is about. I made it a month ago and never used it. I had a whole list of thoughts about my play-through of Pokémon Scarlet, what I thought worked and didn’t work (including that epileptic inducing frame rate–blek!), but I’m not going to get into all that.

Nope.

I’m including the graphic – something I should have used but didn’t at the time – because its a prime example of how I’ve felt about starting the New Year.

***

A LATE(R) NEW YEAR’S MESSAGE

This Weekly Post-Ed began a week ago, before the New Year, before my deadline of this past Monday came and went with a self-esteemed thud. I had written something reminiscent of all the other New Year’s messages that exist on the internet: Fondly recanting all the things I learned from the past year, my hopes for the future.

Then something strange happened: I stopped writing. For several days.

Oh, it wasn’t out of laziness. I had a deadline, a renewed commitment to updating this website, and the draft was nearly finished. Each morning, I sat at my computer, opened the draft, and thought about the fixes I could make. I figured in a day or two, I would be finished. I would smile knowing this Weekly Post-Ed wouldn’t be perfect, but it would be the start of something.

I just had to type the remaining words.

Only, I didn’t.

Each day it was the same: wake up, sit down, write nothing, rinse, repeat. I was seriously concerned. It’s not that I didn’t want to write this Weekly Post-Ed, I just couldn’t. I felt physically incapable, like I suffered a bout of carpel tunnel and the usual way my fingers and wrist flexed were no longer under my control. There was a numbness, a state of nothing.

By the end of the third day, a thought crept to the surface of my mind, something I didn’t want to admit. Then, I wrote a line in all caps in my draft:

“I JUST WANT TO DO NOTHING.”

This struck me as surprisingly true. Nothing at all? After months of skipping out on writing something serious, I still wanted to do nothing? How much more time did I need to get my act together? It’s not like the rest of the world wasn’t planning something grand for the New Year

That’s when I searched online and that is PRECISELY what I found.

There wasn’t the usual smattering of dream vacations and goal-setting that permeated across social media; it was a message of growing despair. I read messages of hopelessness and directionless-ness. I read about those who had had enough to the constant fight to come up with a better, gleaming version of themselves for the upcoming year.

I read messages of wanting it all to stop.

I couldn’t help but agree.

For the first time in my adult life, I didn’t want to think about how this year would be better than the last. I didn’t care about losing weight or publishing more stories, about finding that hidden hobby that liberated my life of all responsibilities, or finding true love or reconnecting with old friends. Deep down, I wanted to do those things, but even more than that I wanted to stop.

Just stop.

I took a moment to consider why. There were the usual suspects: Cultural stressors like a never-ending fight with variants of Covid, the political landscape looking more like the Land of Mordor, a constant connection to the internet and, as a result, constant advertising. From the uptick of pop psychology coming up with another term for what was wrong with me and my childhood, to the constant selling of lifehacks that will boost my creative output/personal happiness/financial security if only I use these easy tips—

–And now Jeremy Renner is in the ER because of a snowplowing accident??

You know what, I just can’t right now.

Let’s do this first:

***

CELESTE OVERHAUL

Photo by celestegame.com

“It was time for a new look to the website and there’s no better wintry design than the game Celeste from developer Matt Makes Games. Not only is the snowy mountain asthetic of Celeste perfect to ring in the New Year, but the themes of the game resonate deeply with me currently. For those that don’t know, the game stars a girl named Madeline who summits Celeste Mountain in order to deal with her anxiety and depression. She meets many friends along the way, including a dark version of herself that she must confront. It’s a game about facing who we are, what we’re capable of, and through the magical gameplay and music that only video games can juxtapose.

Attached below is the art I made for the background, complete with flying strawberries bobbing around Celeste Mountain in the background. I hope you enjoy the new look!

Drop a comment below with your thoughts on Celeste!“

Sincerely,

WHAT REMAINS OF THIS ORIGINAL WEEKLY POST-ED #50 DRAFT

***

A MORE LATE(R) CONCLUSION

I’ve wrestled with a message for over a week now that this is what I have to show. It’s not much at all. It’s all the angst and disbelieving cries from a world that says of the New Year, “Do more? Really? Well, why don’t you get on your knees and suck my…”

You get it.

We all get it.

So, if you’ll excuse me, I’m not quite ready to write my New Year’s message yet. I’m not even ready to acknowledge the blitz of news from the first five days of 2023 yet.

A Buffalo Bills player collapsed on the field after a tackle??

*Insert brain numbing buzz*

At this point, my message is to exist. Consistently. And to show up.

What more is there considering the circumstances?

***

  1. “Void” by Crystal Glass
  2. “Cobain” by Abhi The Nomad & shane doe
  3. “The Core” by Babe Club

***

Wishing everyone as well as you can be. You’re not alone out there,

Jeremy Renner is really in the ER because of a snowplow accident? 2023…just why?

January 5, 2023 0 comments
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